Our Carnival Wedding Extravaganza

Written By Kait Schmidek

As I was putting together the content for this website, I realized we needed some family photos. The last photos my partner and I have are from our from our wedding. Five years and three babies later, our family is looking a little different. Which got me thinking of the magickal day we got hitched.

Before we had a wedding theme, we had a wedding feeling, a tone in mind. We wanted all our guests to have a blast. I wanted to avoid that stuffy wedding, going-through-the-motions feeling that can sometimes happen when we feel like we need to check all of the traditional boxes in order to please everyone and don't really get to plan for ourselves. We wanted whimsy, playfulness, laughter. Robin and Dan's Carnival Wedding Extravaganza was born.

MY AESTHETIC

The morning started with the grannies. Well, the nans, actually. Newfie nans. Me, my mom, and both nans got our hair and makeup done together at Sara Dee Salon in Leduc. My hair and makeup was stellar, pretty much hitting the nail on the head with the pin-up/rockabilly vibes.

My dress was custom ordered from an incredible company in Romania, called Chotronette. It was described as "Sophia Coppola fake movie stills featuring a stalker fan who dreams of becoming Lana del Rey." Sold. It showed up in a little shoebox that gave my mom a heart attack, thinking it was a barbie dress after all. Thankfully, tulle just squishes really well. The shoes are Fluevogs. I love a good excuse to buy me some beautiful shoes, and this wedding = the best of excuses. I brought the dress up to their Whyte avenue location and they let me put it on in the stock room and then I tried on the full store of shoes, I swear.

If I had the time, energy, and motivation, I would look like this most days. You know when you get ready sometime and you're just like, "this look is just me at my core?" This is me at my core. The essence of Robin, if you will.

UPON ARRIVAL

Ok, ok. Enough about me and my aesthetic. Back to the nans. [Sidetracked: one thing I loved about our day is we didn't have a set wedding party. This allowed us to create special times with many guests, not just our friends, and highlight the importance of all kinds of relationships in our lives.] Arriving at the Whitewood Barn, we sat on Chris' patio and ate pastries from the Duchess Bake Shop (please for the love of Goddess if you are ever in Edmonton, eat literally anything from there!). A lil pre-wedding tea party, if you will. I wish we had photos but our incredible photographer hadn't arrived yet. Guests start spilling in and eventually the nans wander away to see who's about.

So you arrive at our venue. The first thing you see is an incredible barn with a silo attached to the side (it's a fucking bar!). The Whitewood Barn. What a stunning venue. What an incredible gift from my parents. Thank you both so fucking much. You're immediately greeted with a lemonade stand (graciously handcrafted created by my husband's uncle) with drinks you can totally spike and cotton candy and popcorn to take into the outdoor ceremony space. Also epic programs designed by Crystal at Twisted Edge.

Soon our photographer arrives, with his incredibly fun attitude and attention to detail. Cole Hofstra Photography, thank you so much. This guy does officiating ceremonies now instead, and if you've ever met him you can see why. I'd hire him in any role for any wedding I ever planned, no question. He kidnaps my dress and shoes, but he brings them back with my bestie. We've been waiting for him, so I'm relieved when I hear a chorus of "the friend is here!" He has come to give me a prepared pre-wedding pep talk. With no wedding party, someone had to give me a pep talk. Cue the bestie. It's feminist as fuck and full of love. And now, I am ready to walk the aisle.

CEREMONY

The ceremony is fucking phenomenal. Exactly what we wanted. Though I didn't get to see it, my husband walks in to the intro to The Verve's "Bittersweet Symphony." I walk down the aisle with a huge bouquet of confetti balloons to a traditional newfie song, Saltwater Joys. The officiant is a long time close friend of mine who makes everyone laugh and facilitates a beautiful ceremony. One part I loved is when he did a "shout out" to other couples in our family and friends circles we look up to or admire. We read our own vows, then did a short and sweet hand fasting ritual. We went with the ritual for many reasons, one of which being I had already lost my engagement ring in the Pembina River, and so we opted for finger tattoos instead of rings.

THE "DOWNTIME"

We do the kissy stuff and the cheering stuff and then head for couples' photos and whatnot. Here comes the in-between ceremony and dinner downtime part where nobody quite knows what to do for a few hours. Not so today! Guests leave the ceremony site and set up on the same property are lawn games, bouncy castles, a balloon artist, and, of course, an open bar.

We do our thing, and then we visit, we play games, laugh, cry, hug, all that emotional wedding day shit. Our favorite tunes are playing on my dad's twenty year old speakers (sounding incredible, by the way). Cute highlights include my girl buying like twenty cheeseburgers from McDonald's and handing them out like candy. Lifesaver. Another close friend of ours made sure I always had a beer in my hand, and being sure to tell me, "this round is on me!" (we had an open bar). Lifesaver. My husbands' aunties took me aside to welcome me properly to the family, tell me how much they loved me, and let me know they would look out for me. That moment really stole my heart. It's so important to feel like you're loved and accepted into a family. Lifesavers, the lot of them.

THE DINNER

Things start to blur here, as all great parties do, from the drinks but also from the magic of having all the humans you love and who love you all in one place to honour you. And you're looking your damn finest. My Leo heart was on fire.

If you thought the Whitewood Barn was incredible on the outside, you'll drool over the whitewashed walls and the rustic tables. The back wall is adorned with handmade flags I sewed myself, as well as trinkets we've collected together over the years, like my favorite vinatge1950's picnic basket and the quilt my nan had made just for us. We have an open seating plan, everyone seating themselves where they liked. This was less chaos and more intimate than you would imagine. You sit down and the centerpieces are all piles of vintage candy and toys. Guests got to eat candy before dinner and throw paper airplanes at each other, among other fun goodies.

Desserts were made by me and our incredible neighbor-family-friend-fairy-godmother (more on this godsend of a woman later), and my nan. This, along with the flags, was definitely a labour of love for me. As I weaved each lattice top on each individual cherry pie, I thought about every single person on our guest list, their importance in my life, and how excited I was to spend the day with them.

SHENANIGANS

There's some eating, some dancing, more drinks, and then a traditional newfie screech-in, led by my fantastic and hilarious uncle. A screech-in is a ritual in which a mainlander can become an honourary newfoundlander. You need to have your foot in the ocean (or in our case, a container of ice cold saltwater), say a newfoundland saying, and kiss an ugly cod fish. My uncle was three sheets to the wind himself but did an excellent job making sure everyone who participated did it the right way. He's a warrant officer, after all. Duty calls.

My recollection slows at this point, until the song "Closing Time" comes on, we're the last ones at the venue and we closed our our own party. Perfect. We take our exit, and the rest is secret and sacred.

I WANT YOU TO FEEL LIKE I DID ON MY WEDDING DAY

This completely epic, completely magickal day will forever be cherished. Most things went perfectly, and the things that didn't were easy to ignore. Come to think of it, this is how I would have liked all my births to go. I want the same for you. My greatest hope is that you feel as beautiful and fierce and centered as a bride on her wedding day. There will of course be some discomfort, some pain, and really hard work, but in the end I want you to feel like your preferences are of utmost importance, and that everyone is there to assure you have a good time. Really, a good time. I want you to feel fucking powerful. Everyone has shown up for your big day, we're all here rooting for and supporting you. It's your birth day.

SOME WORDS ON PRIVILEGE

I do want to be aware of my privilege here, for two very obvious reasons and likely many more I can't see. The first was, my parents were specifically incredibly gracious as far as funding this extravaganza went. They covered everything and more. I literally watched my wildest wedding dreams come true before my eyes. Other family chipped in, too, so the financial support was super solid.

The second was, we had a lot help, from so so many people, but one in particular. In the form of one fairy godmother, a very stellar family friend. She has been an incredible blessing in so many ways throughout major life events, and she pulled out all the stops for us on this one. Not everyone can afford a wedding planner, and we got a stellar one who gifted her services to us, and I will be forever grateful. From a super cute bridal shower to buying up little gifts in preparation, to baking for us, helping with all the decorations, to assembling a wonderful team of helpers and working every angle behind the scenes day-of, we really lucked out with her. Thank you, Robyn.

Credit and Thanks to:

Kait Schmidek

As a website designer & self-proclaimed problem solver, I take the complicated out of bringing your website to life.

https://kaitschmidek.com/
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